We were only freshmen

I launched Parke’s career in journalism. He paid me back in spades, launching my career in public relations. It was really nice to start making decent money

Send Lawyers, Guns & Money…

God smiled upon me, and I was able to cap off my much-ballyhooed, mini vacation in the best way possible last night, spending time with my good friend Parke Burmeister.

______________

Parke and I have known each other since 2003, and he reminded me last night about how we met.

Parke had graduated from Colby College but was killing time, working in construction with dreams of someday being a reporter.

He had tons of enthusiasm but zero experience.

He went to the Press Herald. No dice.

He drove up to the Lewiston Sun Journal. Another rejection.

He was living in OOB, and –undeterred, still chock full of naive enthusiasm — stopped by the offices of the weekly Biddeford-Saco-OOB Courier on a Tuesday afternoon.

At that time, I was the managing editor of the Courier and three other weekly publications owned by Mainely Newspapers, Inc., then owned by David and Carolyn Flood .

What Parke did not know — and what most people did not know — is that Tuesdays were the Courier’s weekly deadline day.

That said, what most people — within 100-mile radius of Biddeford — especially our editorial staff — did know and accept was this:

You don’t fuck around with Randy Seaver on Tuesdays.

Laura and our kids embraced that reality.

I already had a reputation for being grumpy, short-tempered, impatient, brash, arrogant and opinionated.

Just your run-of-the-mill news editor, stressed to the max under a looming deadline and fueled by 36 gallons of coffee and at least two packs of Camel non-filters (I have since quit smoking).

The news staff called me “Chief.” I was a demanding, overbearing perfectionist prick (as it should be in a newsroom)

I made novice reporters cry and more experienced staffers angry and resentful.

I expected everyone around me to also work no less than 140 hours per week.

The news staff called me “Chief.” I was a demanding, overbearing perfectionist prick (as it should be in a newsroom)

So when I was called from my office to the lobby, I was predisposed to being a self-righteous asshole, full of sound and fury.

But I saw something in Parke. Something that intrigued me.

I also thought of all the editors who made me cry when I was a rookie; men like Bob Melville and Harry Foote, both of whom gave me a shot and just a sliver of encouragement.

I don’t remember all the details, but Parke does.

Here’s what I allegedly said in a terse and unforgiving manner:

“Okay,” I huffed. “Here’s the deal. There is a school board meeting in Old Orchard Beach tonight.

“Go there and write a 450-word summary. I’ll publish it and give you a byline as Staff Intern.

“That way, the next time you bother an editor on deadline, at least you’ll have something to show them.”

According to Parke, I then turned away with a huff and retreated to my office.

And that was how it started with me and Parke.

I launched his career in journalism. A few short years later, he played a huge role in launching my career as a political/policy consultant at Barton & Gingold.

Parke fixed my toilet. Laura and I traveled to Cape Cod for his wedding.

RIDING THE MERRY-GO-ROUND | Parke with my wife, Laura, in Old Orchard Beach, Summer, 2005

________________

I have had the distinct honor and privilege of watching Parke’s growth and success for nearly 25 years.

Today, Parke owns and operates a boutique law firm in Portland. He is raising two funny, beautiful and smart daughters.

These are the kind of friends you want.

These are the kind of friends you need.

When friends like this call, you drop everything.

LAST MEN STANDING from Barton & Gingold, a highly regarded public policy consulting firm that was sold and dismantled in 2016. (Left to Right) Tobey Williamson, Parke Burmeister and me after breaking my arm at Moosehead.

_________________

I am so fucking lucky because I have a small handful of other people in this same category.

We had so much fun last night. So many laughs. These are the moments that matter

All The Young Dudes, Redux

An aging news editor still enjoys writing about the young punks who are now taking over his hometown of Biddeford

It’s really very cool being the editor of a community newspaper in a small town like Amity, Mass. – – oops . . . strike that . . . Amity (which means friendship) was a fictional town in the 1975 blockbuster Jaws.

I am not Harry Meadows, the fictional editor of the fictional newspaper — the Amity Gazette — in the fictional town of Amity, Mass.

I am Randy Seaver, the editor of the Biddeford Gazette, the community news organization that covers the city of Biddeford, a city that just feels fictional sometimes.

I must admit, I often channel the overweight, impatient and ass kissing Harry Meadows, a journalist who often blurred the lines between news and opinion and had his head permanently stuck up Mayor Larry Vaughan’s ass.

“Come on guys, I need a picture for the paper . . . stand together. Come on, I need a picture for the paper.”

Newspaper Editor Harry Meadows (far right) listens as Mayor Larry Vaughn (center) schools Amity Police Chief Martin Brody about the inherent perils of these “local waters.” Photo | Jaws Wiki Fan page

If you haven’t figured it out yet, I am a Jaws superfreak fan, and yes – that is why I named my own media outlet the Biddeford Gazette, inspired by the Amity Gazette.

But I digress, like I often do – especially when I forget to take my meds.

RYAN FECTEAU | Then and Now

So, this particular cool story is about State Rep Ryan Feacteau of Biddeford, the man who today serves as Speaker of the Maine House of Representatives.

I first met Ryan more than a decade ago, when he was nothing more than a snot-nosed, young punk looking for votes and name recognition.

Today, not much has changed.

Fecteau is still a snot-nosed young punk looking for votes and name recognition, and I am still an overweight, grumpy news editor.

(Relax. This is satire)

On a more serious note, I have been impressed by Fecteau’s meteoric rise in Biddeford’s political circles.

Although Fecteau and I sometimes disagree on specific policy issues and initiatives, there are a few reasons I really and honestly like him.

He’s smart. He’s funny. He is passionate and hardworking.

But the main reason I like Ryan is because we are kindred spirits. We both care passionately – to our core – about the city of Biddeford and its people.

What I wrote about Fecteau on my blog in 2016

All The Young Dudes (Part One)

“ . .  .Fecteau began what will probably be a long and notable political career by actually winning an election as one of five people elected to serve as a commissioner on the city’s charter review commission.

“The charter commission is not much more than a group of dorks who want to sit around and debate whether the city’s bylaws should include more semicolons.

“There were seven slots available and only five candidates on the ballot, so it’s not like Fecteau proved himself to be a tactical genius.

“But you still have to respect a kid who is willing to tinker with the city’s charter when most young men his age are doing more important things like getting laid or drinking beer.”

What I wrote about Fecteau almost a decade later (2024)

The Top-20 Political Movers and Shakers in Biddeford

“The Number One Position. Numero Uno on the list of the most influential politicians and policy wonks in the Biddeford Saco area . . .

If you’re a political junkie, you probably saw this coming from 10 miles away. Ladies and Gentlemen; boys and girls, I present to you, Ryan Fecteau.”

So, there you have it.

In 2016, I predicted a 20-year-old kid was going places as a politician.

Less than one decade later, that ambitious Charter Review Commission Candidate became the third-most powerful person in Maine’s state political arena.

And I crowned him as the most influential member of Biddeford’s political community.

If you live in Biddeford – and if you are politically ambitious – maybe you should stop by the City Clerk’s office and pick up nomination papers for the upcoming charter commission.

Who knows what will happen next.

______________

Samples of my previous reporting and columns I have published from Mr. Fecteau:

OPINION | Ryan Fecteau | ICE Enforcement activities do not reflect Maine values

            Biddeford Gazette, Feb. 12, 2026

NEWS | Fecteau’s Housing Bill gets bipartisan approval

            Biddeford Gazette, June 22, 2025

NEWS | Court puts Fecteau in national spotlight

            Biddeford Gazette, May 21, 2025

NEWS | Fecteau want to return to Maine House

            Saco Bay News, Jan. 27, 2024

OPINION | I Wanna Hold Your Hand

            Saco Bay News, All Along the Watchtower, Nov. 10, 2023

OPINION | Meet the new boss, same as the old boss

Lessons in Mediocrity, Dec. 15, 2024

INTERVIEW | RYAN FECTEAU by Randy Seaver

            Saco Bay News, Jan. 24, 2023

OPINION | All The Young Dudes

            All Along the Watchtower, Feb. 18, 2012

____________

ABOUT THE AUTHOR | Randy Seaver is still an overweight, grumpy and bald news editor living in the not-so fictional city of Biddeford, Maine. To this day, he is terrified of swimming in the ocean. Send him your news and dieting tips by email | randy@randyseaver.com

Is the Gazette biased against UNE?

From the March 7 issue of the Biddeford Gazette | Reader levels charge of news bias, editor disagrees

By RANDY SEAVEREditor

A former Biddeford resident who now lives in Ada, Mich., recently sent an email to the Biddeford Gazette complaining that we have been “unfair and biased” toward the University of New England.

In his March 6 email, Bernard Roy – a 1971 Biddeford High School graduate – expressed disappointment regarding the Gazette’s coverage of issues connected to UNE.

Roy specifically raised concerns about our March 5 story | Was Sen. Collins misled by UNE?

Roy also expressed outrage that the Gazette “ignored” a letter-to-the-editor he sent to us on Feb. 28, somehow missing the fact that his letter was actually published by the Biddeford Gazette three days later, on March 2, 2026.  LETTER | City is Treating UNE Unfairly

The Gazette regularly and frequently publishes a high volume of news focused on the city of Biddeford. Thus, it is understandable how Roy could have missed seeing his letter published on our site.

The Gazette strongly encourages and promotes transparency and reader feedback regarding our coverage. Go here to submit your own letter

In the interests of transparency and full disclosure, the Gazette is sharing its unedited emailed response to Mr. Roy today, March 7.

“I would advise you to tread carefully before you accuse me and/or the Biddeford Gazette of any negative “bias” toward the University of New England.

1.) We did, in fact, publish your letter to the editor on Monday, March 2, which coincidentally was my birthday and a very busy news day. Here is the link to your piece in the Gazette: LETTER: City is treating UNE unfairly – BIDDEFORD GAZETTE

2.) I did feel compelled to attach an “editor’s note” to your submission. I know that you grew up in Biddeford and graduated from Biddeford High School (Class of 1971) so I was quite surprised that you would complain about how poorly your sister was treated by parking enforcement at Goose Rocks Beach. Most Biddeford folks know that Goose Rocks Beach is located in the town of Kennebunkport, not in the city of Biddeford. I also was left scratching my head, trying to figure how that particular incident has any bearing on the issue at hand . . .

READ THE REST OF OUR RESPONSE HERE

Revenge of Bi-Polar illness

Exhibit 101: Why I regularly blog about my own mental illness and stigma

You may remember him from his classic role as Lewis Skolnik in the 1984 film Revenge of the Nerds. But what you probably didn’t know was that actor Robert Carradine battled with bipolar disease for nearly two decades.

Photo: Wiki Fandom

This week, Carradine, 71, died from suicide. It’s important to talk about this stuff. It’s important to break-down barriers.

It’s important to end stigma.

If you’re struggling, reach out. Get help. There are resources. You can learn more by visiting my blog and checking out some local resources.

You will be missed, Mr. Carradine. Rest In Peace.

________________

ABOUT THE AUTHOR | Randy Seaver is a nearly insufferable malcontent living in Biddeford, Maine. He is a veteran journalist who has been annoying politicians, pundits and his peers since 1981, when he served as an unpaid student intern at the former Journal Tribune. He is the editor and founder of the Biddeford Gazette, a non-profit digital media outlet that focuses on the city of Biddeford. Send your praise or angry comments to randy@randyseaver.com

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Unsolicited advice for a young candidate

Although I am no longer working as a political/PR consultant (Thank Christ), I still find the subject matter intriguing, especially when it’s literally taking place in my own back yard.

Today, I am pretty much consumed with running the Biddeford Gazette, a non-profit media outlet hyper-focused on covering the city of Biddeford.

As part of our ongoing news coverage, the Gazette is beginning its coverage of this year’s various legislative and county races in the Biddeford area.

I am currently working on a preview piece about the race in State Senate District 32, which includes Biddeford and its surrounding communities of Arundel, Dayton, Hollis and Lyman.

The seat is currently held by Henry Ingwersen, a nice enough guy and a retired beekeeper from Arundel.

Ingwersen — a Democrat who is hoping for a third consecutive term — serves as chair of the Health & Human Services Committee and also serves on the Agriculture, Conservation and Forestry Committee.

Ingwersen is today facing challenges from at least two lesser-known candidates, Jason Litalien, an unenrolled Biddeford attorney and political newcomer John Salamone, a Republican who recently moved to Hollis from Portland.

I personally know both Ingwersen and Litalien, and I will be writing much more as we continue the march toward the Nov. 2026 election, but today I’m focusing on the reportedly brash GOP candidate trying to make a splash in the sleepy hamlet of Hollis,

According to his social media accounts, Salamone is a “digital creator,” just like thousands of 16-year-olds on Tik-Tok.

His campaign website is fairly standard: it’s clean, easy to navigate and provides detailed information about the candidate’s policy concerns. But there is one rather glaring, missing piece of information: There is no contact information. Zip. Zero. Nada. Zilch.

Do digital creators just communicate via telepathy?

If you’re a candidate for public office, don’t you want the media — and voters — to be able to contact you?

Look, let’s get real. I’m an old-school hack born on the cusp between Boomer and Gen. X.

My own websites — this blog and the Biddeford Gazette’s landing page — are both rather perfunctory and pedestrian– not a lot of pizazz. Web site design is not my forte, but I do know enough to have a visible “Contact” link.

Call me old school, but most people still enjoy using email, telephones and text messaging.

Finally, on a somewhat unrelated note, who is advising this guy? His campaign photo shows him scowling and not looking at the camera (translated: not looking at potential supporters) He comes across as an angry millennial about to kill the neighbor’s dog.

Like I said at the top, my days as a campaign consultant (an 82.3% win ratio) are behind me. So, what do I know?

Good luck to Mr. Salamone, but maybe you should try cracking a smile and don’t make it so difficult for us pesky journalists to contact you.

_______________________

Randy Seaver is a nearly insufferable malcontent living in Biddeford, Maine. He is a veteran journalist who has been annoying politicians, pundits and his peers since 1981, when he served as an unpaid student intern at the former Journal Tribune. He is the editor and founder of the Biddeford Gazette, a non-profit digital media outlet that focuses on the city of Biddeford. Send your praise or angry comments to randy@randyseaver.com

Subscribe today for free . . . it’s worth it!

Christmas Chaos 2025: You’re Invited!

The Christmas holiday is right around the corner.

What does that mean?

For a lot of people, it means stress, extra work and financial strains. For others, it means awkward obligations to attend family events.

On the other end of the spectrum, many people are facing the prospect of being alone with no place to go on a day that is supposed to be merry and bright.

Well, let go of that stress and let’s make Christmas fun again!

You are now invited to the ninth annual Seaver Christmas Chaos Event on Christmas Day, Dec. 25. This is a free, community event with zero obligations, no expectations and no formalities!

There are no strings attached, no gifts, no expectations. Just fun, laughter and camaraderie. Stop by for an hour or two or stay the entire day.

Doors open at 10:30 a.m. we will open a fully-stocked bar and my famous Bloody Mary Cocktails that include giant shrimp and bacon. Plenty of soft drinks and other beverages will also be available.

Appetizers, including Laura’s world-famous stuffed mushroom caps, deviled eggs, spicy meatballs, shrimp, finger sandwiches, baked spinach balls, pickles, crackers and chips. will be available throughout the day.

PLEASE NOTE CHANGE: We will not do a sit-down dinner this year. We want flexibility for our guests and give Laura more time to enjoy the festivities.

Thus, there is NO need to RSVP. Come when you like, leave when you want.

You are welcome to bring a guest (or two, or three . . . whatever. This is a dog-friendly home. Each year, we have more participants, the more, the merrier.

This is a great way to decompress and have some fun. You don’t need to bring anything. If you choose, however, we will be collecting non-perishable food items for the Biddeford Food Pantry.

Come meet new friends and see old friends! This event gets more popular each year. We look forward to seeing you!

WHEN: December 25, 2025 (Christmas Day) 10:30 a.m. to midnight.

WHERE: 23 Lamothe Avenue, Biddeford, Maine.

COUNTDOWN TO NEXT YEAR’S EVENT:

1798214400

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until

CHRISTAMS CHAOS 2026

I’ve got a Golden ticket

Once again, it would seem that many of Maine’s most ardent Democrats cannot see the forest for the trees.

And that’s saying something, especially since Maine is the most forested state in the country.

Matt Dunlap, Maine’s former secretary of state, decided to end his four-day titillating tease, ceasing the media foreplay — will he or won’t he — make a primary challenge against incumbent Rep. Jared Golden, a much more moderate Democrat?

U.S. Rep. Jared Golden (photo: Wiki Commons)

Maine’s Second Congressional District offers a virtual smorgasbord of political ideologies. Despite the common misconceptions of southern Maine folks, CD2 is not just a swath of God-fearing, gun-toting and Bible-thumping rednecks, it is also home to progressive enclaves such as Belfast, Lewiston and Bar Harbor.

Over the last four years, Golden has figured out how to saddle the district that is almost evenly divided between Republicans and Democrats.

Victories for Golden have been hard fought and razor-thin, but never since winning his first election to the U.S. House in 2018 has Golden been challenged by his own party – – – until now.

Less than a year ago, Golden eked out his re-election campaign with only 50.3 percent of the vote over Republican newcomer Austin Theriault, who lost by a little more than 3,000 votes with 49.7 percent of the vote,

Folks, federal elections don’t come much closer than this.

But that was 2024, when Trump supporters were campaigning with a fevered pitch. Still, Golden held strong and put on a clean flannel shirt for the cameras on Election Day.

Golden won his first term as a U.S. Representative in 2018, facing incumbent Bruce Poliquin. That race was telling. Golden won, but it was no landslide: 50.9 percent to 49.4 percent.

For a while, it seemed that Maine Democrats had learned their lesson, suffering back-to-back losses in CD2 when progressive candidate Emily Cain was propped up by her party to take down the evil Poliquin. The short, balding guy with a creepy grin beat her twice, in 2014 (45.2 percent) in a three-way contest; and again in 2016 (54.8 – 45.2 percent)

I believe it was the 2016 election when Democrats were finally willing to admit that a more moderate approach would be needed if they wanted to capture Maine’s Second Congressional District.

In fact, Golden – though acting like a political maverick right out of the gate – did not face a primary challenge in 2020, 2022 and in the 2024 race.

But many Democrats said they were simply holding their noses when casting a ballot for Golden. The balance of power in Washington was shifting. Republicans had gained a lot of ground.

For a while, it seemed that
Maine Democrats had learned
their lesson”

Every seat mattered.

According to several of my sources within the Maine Democratic Party, the Dems realized that they had to forsake the perfect to get the good.

But enough is enough, I suppose.

Enter Matt Dunlap and the Golden ticket he apparently found in a Wonka chocolate bar.

Will there be a test?

From all accounts, Dunlap is a decent guy. He is affable, a bit quirky and probably never sat at the cool kids’ table in the high school cafeteria.

Sure, he is currently Maine’s auditor and previously served as Maine’s Secretary of State (both appointed positions by the Legislature) but it seems as if there is not a lot of meat on his 61-year-old bones.

State Auditor Matthew Dunlap

Let’s face facts. Dunlap is hardly a heavy hitter. But his party has called him up from the JV team and coordinated a press conference.

Here’s a fun fact: Dunlap was elected Maine State Auditor by the Maine Legislature and took office on January 4, 2021, but had to give up the position after failing the exams needed to meet the requirements of his new position.

He did later meet the requirements and was selected for the position again on November 14, 2022.

I’m a boy, and I’m a man

Golden, it seems, has gone a bit too far in being a moderate. He consistently refuses to toe the party line all the time. He must be held accountable.

With Trump in the White House, the last thing Democrats want is a representative who is willing to reach across the aisle. You know? A consensus builder . . . a, what do you call it? . . . oh yeah, an “Independent.”

But here’s the deal. Maine is really a purple state.

Former Maine Governor Paul LePage

Chellie (I’ll stay in D.C. until I die) Pingree is a progressive Democrat, and she’s not going anywhere, despite the incredibly stupid move by now Biddeford Mayor Marty Grohman who ran as an Independent and tried to beat her.

Yeah, that didn’t work out so well.

Susan Collins, a Republican, is chair of the Senate Appropriations Committee. She is going nowhere. Maine’s other senator won’t even call himself a Democrat even though he votes with the Democrats more than 98 percent of the time.

On the heels of Trump’s 2024 victory, Maine Republicans are betting on former Governor Paul LePage to finally knock Golden from his perch.

Trump did well in Maine’s CD2 last year. As expected, Harris won Maine’s 1st Congressional District while Trump won Maine’s 2nd Congressional district.

For Democrats, the question once again becomes are you going to sacrifice the good for the perfect?

If so, I think you’re making a big mistake. But what do I know?

_________________

Randy Seaver is the editor and founder of the Biddeford Gazette. He may be reached by email: randy@randyseaver.com

c.) 2025 All Rights Reserved

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Crazy, homeless people: What do we do?

Originally published in the Bangor Daily News, September 23, 2025

A homeless encampment in Biddeford that was cleared by the city in 2024 (Seaver)

In a lot of ways, I am probably a lot like you.

I am a middle-aged, married white guy with a mortgage and a modest home in a quiet residential neighborhood with well-manicured lawns and friendly neighbors.

I love living in Maine. I have two grown children. I adore my dog, and I am blessed to have many good friends. I fret about rising property taxes, and it feels as if I am eternally engaged in thermostat battles with my wife.

I work hard, follow the law and pay my taxes. I drive a late-model Chevy Silverado pick-up truck and enjoy camping at both Rangeley and Moosehead lakes.

But there is another part of me that you would likely never guess unless I told you.

From the outside, my life may look almost idyllic or at least average, run-of-the-mill, but I have to work to maintain this stability and my outward appearance.

For more than 40 years, I have struggled with a wide range of mental health issues, from bi-polar depression and severe anxiety to raucous bouts of schizoid-affective disorder.

I recognize and accept my responsibility to manage my mental health, but it’s not always easy. Some of the medications I take affect everything from my libido to my weight. I am one of the lucky ones, I have a good psychiatrist.  I also participate in regular counseling with a therapist. My insurance covers the bulk of my prescription costs.

Although hidden from the public view, there is a toll, and I sometimes feel as if my illness is a burden on my family, especially my wife, who is my greatest support and the person who ensures that I am taking my meds as prescribed.

As a young adult in my early 20s, I struggled with stability on every level. My employment was erratic. The few relationships I had were chaotic. At three different times, I found myself homeless, living on the proverbial outer edge of society.

I was reluctant to take medications. I did not want to be controlled or – as I saw it – poisoned by society. I did a lot of couch surfing. I even landed in jail for assaulting a police officer.

I was in and out of various psychiatric facilities both on a voluntary and involuntary basis. I got in trouble with the Secret Service for talking about what I would like to do to President Reagan in 1984.

Flash forward more than 40 years.

Just like you, I was shocked, saddened and angry about the brutal, senseless killing of a young woman on a commuter train in Charlotte, North Carolina last week.

She did not deserve that fate. Her family did nothing to warrant such tremendous loss and heart-breaking grief.

How do we comfort them? How do we reconcile the fact that millions of Americans are living on the edge of society, saddled with a significant illness and a stunning lack of resources?

How do we handle our anger? Our resentment?

Sadly, I do not have any answers. I know that my friends on the political right talk a good game about mental illness in the wake of every mass shooting, but then suddenly get quiet when it comes to legislation that requires increased funding for mental health services.

Just like you, I was shocked, saddened
and angry about the brutal, senseless
killing of a young woman on a commuter
train in Charlotte, N.C. last week.

Meanwhile, my friends on the political left talk a lot about community-based care, often forgetting that there are some people who need to be involuntarily hospitalized.

While I do not have any answers, I do know this: we cannot afford to sacrifice our humanity and our shared sense of decency and compassion.

Our national dialogue has become so vitriolic that a major television network commentator can publicly suggest involuntary euthanasia for homeless people who refuse mental health treatment.

Think about that for just a minute or two.

Set aside the 14th Amendment if you need to.

There is a large group of people in this country who heard Mr. Kilmeade’s statements and simply shrugged.

I was a homeless person who often refused treatment. Did I deserve to be put to death for refusing to take medications?

Have we fallen so far that we are now willing to even entertain the notion of rounding up and killing some of our most vulnerable citizens?

If so, just remember that so-called solution will require rounding up people who look and act a lot like you and me.

_________________

Randy Seaver is the editor and founder of the Biddeford Gazette. He regularly blogs on issues regarding mental health and his own journey toward recovery. E-mail randy@randyseaver.com

If I were King of the DNC

I got a lot of angry feedback about my last blog post, which suggested that Democrats and others who despise President Trump need to do a lot more than attend rallies and protests if they really want things to change.

I learned some lessons from that post, namely that I buried the lead of what I was really trying to say.

That post was also way too long, and I learned that you can’t kick readers in the nuts and then ask them to consider the larger picture.

I apologize. So, allow me to try a different tact this week.

Our problems are much greater and complicated than Donald Trump

In addition to running a small, Biddeford-focused media site, I earn a living by offering clients throughout New England political and public relations advice.

Although I have never worked professionally on a federal campaign, I do have a pretty good track record when it comes to statewide and municipal campaigns.

So instead of criticizing others, allow me to offer my own unsolicited advice to those who are really concerned about the Trump Administration.

Before we proceed, allow me to ask you a question that I ask of each new client: which is more important to you: your pride or your greed?

Think of that question this way: your “pride” is about how you do things and your ego. Your “greed” is about your objective and what you want.

There is not a right nor wrong answer to that question, but if your pride is more important than your greed you should probably save your time and stop reading here.

I cannot help you if your pride is greater than your greed.

Stop doing this!

If I were king of the DNC

Here is my unsolicited and free advice in five easy steps.

  1. Take a deep breath. Acknowledge the painful loss and allow that disappointment to be the fuel that drives you. Ask yourself and your friends some hard and difficult questions about went wrong.
  • Protests are fine, but don’t miss the bigger picture. The midterm elections will be here before we know it. Now is the time to develop crisp and clear messaging that focuses on positive messages. Simply bashing Trump on social media or during rallies is not enough. We all learned that lesson the hard way seven months ago.
  • Do some reconnaissance work. Start watching FOX News. Attend events that you would normally abhor. What are the other guys saying and doing? Go beyond your comfort level and actually listen to what the other guys are saying, no matter how badly you disagree.
  • We need more voters. The last presidential election was razor-thin. Trump won the popular vote by a margin of only 1.48 percent.  We need to peel off the moderate Republicans. Stop catering to the far-left progressives. When it matters, they will line up. Find a candidate (candidates) like Bill Clinton. Someone told me recently that Clinton was his favorite Republican president.
  • Finally – and most importantly – take the high road. Let your greed trump your pride. Stop ridiculing and name-calling conservatives. Stop making fun of them. Stay on the high road as if your life depends on it, because it does. Do your very best to respectfully engage. Don’t talk to them. Listen. Ask them questions. Find out what’s important to them. Listen. Take notes.

As Ghandi said, you do not help a man see your point of view by giving him a black eye.

I could learn a thing or two from Ghandi. How about you?

For a deeper analysis of what I think went wrong in November, check this piece.

__________________

Randy Seaver is a cranky, nearly insufferable malcontent living in Biddeford. He may be contacted by email: randy@randyseaver.com

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Fear and Loathing in Biddeford

It’s been a crazy, hectic and somewhat emotional week.

On the work front, I was dealing with back-to-back significant news stories that took up a lot of my energy and time.

And — Laura chipped a tooth while eating a salad (Exhibit 104 of why you should avoid salads). The ensuing emergency dental visit put a nice little ding on the bank account.

We struggled with getting the camper ready for the season, and could not figure out why the battery was not charging. It’s fixed now. Also, the work week was evenly framed by two Saturdays of rain. Nice. I am already way behind on my outdoor chores.

And then there is always the plentiful criticism, the wailing and gnashing of teeth from people who are upset about me being one of the admins on the Biddeford + Saco Community Facebook page. What else is new?

But there was one thing that hit me much harder than expected this week. It was supposed to be a rather benign feature story about the closing of the JFK Memorial School in Biddeford.

My friend Liz Gothelf, publisher of Saco Bay News, was also there to cover the story, but I doubt that she experienced any of the emotional baggage that I felt walking back into that building for – presumably – the last time.

I would not be who I am today
if I didn’t shit my pants in the first-grade.

You see, I was a first and second-grade student at JFK, just before my parents bought their home in Saco.

Liz and I left the press event at the same time. On our way out, we spotted a large canvass hanging in the hallway. Apparently, it was used to take pictures of the students. The banner read: “Be Awesome Today! We Are So Proud of You.”

We simply could not just walk past that photo opportunity. We took pictures of each other under the banner before exchanging goodbyes in the parking lot.

I quickly walked back to my truck, trying to hold back the tears welling up inside of me. I didn’t want anyone to see me crying.

All I could think about in that moment was a little six-year-old boy so afraid of his surroundings and the teacher that he literally shit his pants instead of asking the teacher to use the bathroom.

It might be okay if that was an isolated incident. Accidents happen, more literally: shit happens. But this was just a symptom and sort of encapsulated how I continued living my life.

For as long as I can remember, I have always been afraid. Always.

I was afraid of the other kids. I was shy, terrified of gym classes with Mr. Stanley at Young School in Saco. I was terrified of storms, I believed my parents were intentionally trying to poison me.

This carried on into high school. I was a shy basket case. I went through the motions, almost completely disconnected from my classmates. In fact, you cannot find a photo of me in our senior yearbook.

It’s as if I was invisible, and that’s how I liked it.

The fear thing continued into my very brief stint in the Air Force and followed me to college and later as I rather aimlessly shifted about the country. In and out of psychiatric facilities in Arizona, Tennessee and Oregon.

Things didn’t really change until the late 1990s when I was hired by the Biddeford-Saco Courier. All of a sudden, I had both a purpose and a personality. A couple of years later, I met Laura.

Today, I am not afraid of public restrooms. I’m not afraid of the teachers or even the principal.

Almost 55 years later, I was telling the teachers and staffers where to stand and how to pose for the photo. People listen to me — and for reasons I do not understand – they seem to respect me.

I wish I could go back in time and tell that terrified, little boy that he doesn’t have to be afraid; that very good things are coming his way. I wish I could tell him, ““Be Awesome Today! We Are So Proud of You.”

But you know what?

I would not be who I am today if I didn’t shit my pants in the first-grade.

Randy Seaver is a cranky, nearly insufferable malcontent living in Biddeford. He may be contacted by email: randy@randyseaver.com

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