Category: BLOG POSTS

Commentary that has not been published elsewhere.

Losing My Religion, Part Deux

~ Randy Seaver ~ Leave a comment

Originally published at Saco Bay News, April 6, 2024

This is a story about a Maine state senator and some very blatant hypocrisy and the pure political exploitation of a religious holiday.

Despite the claims made by some neo-conservatives and other outright bigots, I believe — as did former President Ronald Reagan — that our country is only made stronger and more noble because we embrace and assimilate many different cultures and ethnicities under one umbrella; a nation where all those seeking freedom can co-exist equally and each set a course in the pursuit of happiness.

Henry Ingwersen/ Campaign site photo

Diversity is a good thing. Inclusion is a good thing — right up until such ideals are exploited for political favor or for silly campaign fodder.

As President Reagan eloquently explained in his 1987 speech before the World Affairs Council, “You can live in Germany, Turkey, or Japan, but you can’t become a German, a Turk, or Japanese,” Reagan said. “But anyone, from any corner of the earth, can come live in America and become an American. That is the essence and ultimate strength of our nation.”

But this is not a column about Ronald Reagan.

Instead, this is a column about State Sen. Henry Ingwersen, a Democrat seeking re-election to again represent the communities of Biddeford, Arundel and Kennebunk in the Maine State Senate for a second term.

Ingwersen is a nice enough guy, but he also might possibly be the whitest person to ever roam the shores of southern Maine. And he knows it. I think it actually causes him pain.

Ingwersen recently appeared almost desperate to showcase his appreciation for the ideals of diversity and inclusion. So desperate, in fact, that he actually took the time to send Saco Bay News a press release pointing out the fact that he attended a recent dinner to celebrate and honor Maine’s growing Muslim community during a time of their high holiday celebrations.

I think it’s awesome that Ingwersen took the time to attend the recent Iftar Celebration dinner, which celebrates the end of the daily fast during Ramadan. The community dinner was held at Southern Maine Health Care last Saturday.

Saturday’s celebration was rescheduled due to poor weather conditions. Thus, this celebration of the Muslim faith was held smack dab between Good Friday and Easter, two of the most important holidays in the Christian faith.

Laura and I were invited to the event but were unable to attend the rescheduled dinner. I was looking forward to it because I know next to nothing about the culture surrounding the Muslim faith.

According to a nugget I found on the city of Biddeford’s official website, ”during the holy month of Ramadan, Muslims worldwide dedicate time to spiritual reflection; at the heart of this sacred month lies the principle of charity, known as ‘Zakat’ in Arabic. Charity (Zakat) holds profound significance as one of the Five Pillars of Islam, underscoring the importance of sharing one’s wealth with those in need.”

More about the celebration and its cultural significance can be found in the April 8 edition of the Biddeford Beat newsletter, a municipal publication distributed online by city officials.

Full disclosure: I was raised Catholic and did not attend Mass on either Good Friday or on Easter Sunday. I have a complicated relationship with God, but I think He/She/It appreciates the fact that I avoid the hypocrisy of just going to Mass on high holidays such as Christmas and Easter.

But back to Ingwersen. I don’t recall getting a press release from the senator celebrating Easter, Chanukah or Wesak, which celebrates the birth of Buddha.

No press release and accompanying photo of Henry Ingwersen on Ash Wednesday or any other of the more boring traditional holidays likely celebrated by an overwhelming percentage of his constituents.

And that’s a good thing. Elected officials should really leave religion at home and not use it to curry the voters’ favor or to appear more “hip and diverse.”

The ultimate irony here is that Ingwersen politically decimated a Christian pastor who ran unsuccessfully as the Republican nominee for the District 32 senate  seat.

I, and many others, found it a bit strange that Rev. David Corbett used his religious title in his campaign materials, including his lawn signs.

Despite common misconceptions, there is no specific mention of a “separation of church and state” in the Constitution. The First Amendment does, however, prohibit the government from establishing a national religion.

Many Democrats across the country are currently mocking Donald Trump’s sickening campaign ploy to sell autographed Bibles.

The Democrats laugh and point and Trump’s blatant hypocrisy and how he exploits Christians for his own political gain.

What would they think about Ingwersen actively seeking media attention for attending a religious event? Is what’s good for the goose good for the gander?

Ingwersen should publicly apologize for trying to use a wonderful community event for his own political gain.

In the movie Jaws, Police Chief Martin Brody says: “I’m the chief of police. I can do anything.” He soon learns a lesson about his arrogance.

Hopefully, Henry will learn a lesson, too.

Attending the dinner and celebration is important. Many other local politicians attended the event. But sending out a press release and a photo of yourself at the event is just boorish.

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So Long and Thanks for All the Fish

~ Randy Seaver ~ 1 Comment

The title of this week’s blog post comes from writer Douglas Adams and his series of books in the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy anthology.

I thought it was an apt title for a column about Bobby Mills’ quite sudden and rather mystifying resignation from the Biddeford City Council on Tuesday afternoon. Mills will also resign his current position as York County Treasurer, effective April 15.

Bob Mills/ Facebook photo

In response to a phone call, Mills sent me a curt text message saying he was resigning his public offices (yes, plural) for “personal reasons.”

I have been covering Bob Mills’ political career for nearly 15 years. It’s been quite a ride.

In all honesty, I think I have sometimes gone a bit overboard when critiquing Mills’ service on the city council. I routinely criticized him for bloviating during council meetings and for his incessant self-promotion. In summary, I think I have been just a bit too harsh on Councilor Mills and his service to the people he represents.

I once told a friend that only Bob Mills was able to miraculously outpace both Marty Grohman and Justin Chenette when it comes to seizing almost every opportunity to win public office.

Mills was first elected to the city council in 2007. He once fended off a five-way challenge for his seat. He also unsuccessfully ran against fellow Democrat Megan Rochelo for her seat in the Maine House of Representatives.

But something strange has happened in the last couple of years. Mills has become a lot more measured, a lot more thoughtful and a lot more professional. In all honesty, he does take his take his service to the community very seriously.

One of his fellow councilors described Mills as “tenacious and 110 percent dedicated” to his constituents and the city as a whole.

Serving on the city council is a thankless job. It is time consuming and offers a monthly stipend of less than $100, working out to about $1.15 an hour, considering the time needed to review documents, constituent service, attend workshops, special meetings and regular meetings of the council.

I also have a lot of respect for Mills because of his ability to accept criticism from blowhards like me without ever making things personal. We may never be close friends but Mills always — always — treated me with respect, courtesy and professionalism. He always returned my calls; always treated me fairly. In retrospect, maybe he was the bigger and better man than me.

It’s quite easy for people like me to sit back and publicly criticize politicians, but it’s not so easy to endure those criticisms when you’re sitting on the other side of the fence.

Because Mills has served fewer than 180 days since his last election, the city will need to hold a special election to fill the now vacant Ward Four seat on the city council.

I am sure that the city will find a decent and honorable person to fill the vacancy, but speaking just for me, I will honestly miss Bob Mills and his presence on the council.

Appearing before 100 reporters at the Beverly Hilton Hotel in 1962, former president Richard Nixon lashed out at the media, following his bitter loss in the California gubernatorial election.

“You won’t have Nixon to kick around anymore,” Nixon told the press corps. “because, gentlemen, this is my last press conference.”

Well, it looks like this is my last bog post about Bobby Mills. Good luck, sir and my sincere thanks for your long tenure of service to our community. I will miss you.

Thanks for all the fish.

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Dance This Mess Around

~ Randy Seaver ~ Leave a comment

Some helpful advice for the North Koreans, the Chinese, the Russians or anyone else looking to destroy the United States.

Forget about obliterating our infrastructure, such as roads, bridges and tunnels. Don’t bother bombing NORAD or any of our ballistic missile sites.

All you need to do is take out Facebook.

Apparently, based on my anecdotal observations during this last Nor’easter storm, taking out Facebook would essentially cripple two-thirds of our population, most notably folks under 30.

Maybe I should be more tolerant. After all, many young adults have no fucking clue about a world where you don’t share what you had for breakfast or what movie you’re watching with 300 million of your closest friends.

As I predicted, throughout this last storm I witnessed dozens of people posing completely banal questions on local community pages:

My power is out. When will it be back on?

Is Burger King open?

Is there a parking ban?

Are they collecting the trash today?

How do I make toast when the power is out?

My question for you morons is this: You know how to use Facebook, why not give Google a try?

Understandably, many of these clueless, helpless and rather fragile folks post their questions anonymously on community and group pages. They must have an innate sense that they are too stupid to survive without a safe place, an emotional support animal and on-demand episodes of The Bachelorette; and they don’t want to embarrass themselves.

Going on Facebook to ask a question that you could easily answer for yourself is akin to running naked into the street and screaming, “Where is my underwear?”

I dunno. Did you check the dryer? Maybe your sock drawer?

How on Earth could this storm catch you in such a vulnerable place that you cannot function on your own without somebody else holding your hand?

Losing power is a shitty situation. It sucks. Then again, you have known for at least six days that this was coming. Why were you not prepared?

If you lose power, maybe – – and I’m just spit-ballin’ here – you should check with the power company instead of asking Aunt Gladys when you will get your Netflix working again.

If you’re posting on Facebook, then you have access to the internet, which means you can visit the Central Maine Power website and download their app onto your phone.

No one has a better handle on accurate information than CMP. For those of you too stupid to find this info, just click this link.

If you want information about parking bans, check your municipality’s web site.

For example, here in Biddeford, you can find about updates about all city services and resources by simply clicking this link.

You can also sign up for e-mail notifications about parking bans. You could even call the 24/7 parking ban hotline. You can find that number by using Google.

Bottom line, it is in your best interest to become a bit more self-reliant.

I enjoy using Facebook. It has become a valuable tool for staying in touch with friends and family. But it should never be a survival tool. Why?

Consider this: Access to social media sites is basically unlimited, which means there are some very bad people out there and also a lot of morons who don’t know whether to wind their ass or scratch their watch during a storm.

There are also a lot of people who have no clue about what “winding a watch” means. Thus, you really should not rely on Facebook for your news and information.

Learn how to take care of yourself instead of freaking out in public and expecting the rest of us to answer questions you could easily answer yourself. Now I’m going to sign off and post a picture of my lunch on Facebook.

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Don’t Steal My Sunshine

~ Randy Seaver ~ Leave a comment

Note: This is the unedited version of my March 8, 2024 installment of All Along the Watchtower that originally appeared on the Saco Bay News website.

It probably would not come as much of a surprise if I were to tell you that a lot of people don’t like me very much.

Chief among those who will never join the official Randy Seaver Fan Club is none other than Biddeford City Manager James Bennett.

City Manager James Bennett. Photo credit: City of Biddeford website.

According to several sources, Bennett really, really does not like me.

He hates me more than Richard Nixon hated Carl Bernstein; more than Paul LePage hates Bill Nemitz.

Of course, Jim has never said that to my face, but that’s pretty much par for the course when it comes to Biddeford’s city manager.

Some people don’t like me because I have strong opinions and rarely turn down an opportunity to share those opinions with as many people as possible.

Others are jealous of my rugged good looks, my brilliant mind and my ability to string together sentences on an empty stomach.

But mostly, people are jealous of me because of my smoking hot wife. They shake their heads, wondering how Laura could possibly want to share her bed with a significantly overweight, bald guy who wears partial dentures and takes five different medications to combat persistent mental health issues.

Sadly, every single thing in the above paragraph is absolutely true. Not a lick of sarcasm. (Smoking two packs of non-filtered cigarettes every day for nearly 40 years takes a toll. Just trust me on this.)

Back to Bennett.

While there are several people in Biddeford who would probably love to see me jump to my death from atop the MERC smokestack, few of them have as much reason to hate me as does Jim Bennett.

Over the last couple of years, I have been a thorn in Bennett’s heel. A proverbial fly in the ointment —- in short, I have been a real pain in his ass.

I have publicly critiqued his management style. I have talked and written about things that he would probably prefer to keep under the radar. I pester him, calling his office and sending him emails in an effort to dig up and report public information.

I have written and published stories that don’t always paint the most flattering picture of my community.

Why do I do this? Why am I such a jerk? Who needs pesky reporters roaming the hallways of City Hall unsupervised?

I mean, really. The city has its own Facebook page. In fact, our tax dollars are used so that the city can write its own news about what the city is doing. What could possibly go wrong?

Why do we need independent, third-party journalists?

I’m a believer

This coming week (March 10-16) we will once again celebrate National Sunshine Week, and it has nothing to do with turning our clocks forward one hour.

Sunshine Week is a national initiative spearheaded by the American Society of News Editors. It was founded in 2005, and its purpose is to highlight the tools and resources that the media (and the general public) has to ensure open and transparent government.

Why should Sunshine Week matter to you?

Jim Zachary, national deputy editor for CNHI, penned a column for the American Society of News Editors. The following is an excerpt:

“The media is most definitely not your enemy,” Zachary wrote. “Far from being the enemy of the people, day in and day out we take our role as the Fourth Estate (government oversight) seriously and work hard to protect your right to know, making public records requests and attending public meetings to keep you informed.

“Why?

“Because we believe all the business government does, whether in open public meetings or behind closed doors, is your business.

“We believe every last penny government spends is your money.

“We believe it is your right to know every transaction, every decision, every expenditure and every deliberation of your government.

“Whether talking about the White House, the statehouse or the county courthouse, all the documents held in government halls belong to the people, and all the business conducted by our governors is public business.”

Sunshine Week coincides with the anniversary of the Freedom of Information Act, federal legislation that was signed into law by President Lyndon Johnson in 1966 just as the Vietnam War was heating up.

The Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) provides the media with the legal muscle that we need in order to keep the public informed about government affairs.

One of the earliest and most notable uses of the FOIA was its role in the Watergate scandal. Washington Post reporters Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein had to use extraordinary tactics, which included FOIA, in order to get to the truth that eventually crumbled Richard Nixon’s presidency.

Last week, Biddeford City Manager James Bennett presented his proposed annual budget to the city council. I sat there, in the back row, taking notes. I was the only reporter there. Honestly, it made me very sad.

Thirty years ago, there would be at least three reporters at every city meeting. But it’s different now. The Portland Press Herald closed its local Main Street bureau. The locally owned Biddeford-Saco Courier was sold and the Journal Tribune, formerly the Biddeford Daily Journal, this area’s iconic news source, fell victim to the ongoing corporate butchering of local media coverage, closing its doors forever.

Today, the Portland Press Herald rarely covers local news in the Biddeford-Saco area. Reporter Gillian Graham is smart, talented and hardworking, but she is spread thin, and her employer has opted to save money by using the weekly Biddeford-Saco Courier to cover news in this neck of the woods.

Eloise Goldsmith, the Courier’s newest reporter, is also smart, talented and hard-working. That said, Goldsmith’s editors expect her to cover the communities of Biddeford, Saco, Old Orchard Beach, Kennebunk, Kennebunkport and Arundel.

How we can we possibly expect one person to cover such a large geographic area?

 Many years ago, when I was the Courier’s editor, we had one reporter covering Biddeford, another reporter covering Saco and Old Orchard Beach; and yet another reporter covering the towns of Kennebunk, Kennebunkport and Arundel for our sister publication, The Post.

Today, we are expecting one reporter to do the same job as three reporters did 25 years ago.

According to a Brookings Institution report, more than 2,000 newspapers across the country ceased publication in the last 15 years or so. The shuttering of newspapers presents a very real and present danger to our most basic freedoms.

Who cares? Who does this hurt?

It hurts you, your wallet and your neighbors.

Thankfully, one young woman from Old Orchard Beach decided that this area deserves a media source to help fill the coverage gap left behind by the changing local journalism landscape.

When the Journal Tribune closed its doors a few years ago, reporter Liz Gotthelf packed up her belongings and decided to launch Saco Bay News, a free online, professional news source.

Running an independent media source is no easy task. There is no such thing as a 40-hour work-week. The income sucks, the hours are long and the work is often so tedious that is causes migraines.

It is a mostly a thankless task and easily criticized by people who know very little about journalism. But Liz is fully committed. She is an idealist, and she firmly believes that you should have consistent, reliable information regarding everything from the opening of a new eatery to coverage of bank robbery, a structure fire and yes even your local budget.

I Can’t Get No (Satisfaction)

Jim Bennett will routinely ignore my telephone calls and emails. It doesn’t hurt my feelings, but it’s a disservice to the people I work for: you.

I treat Jim Bennett differently than any other city employee, including department heads. I have never written (and will never write) a disparaging column about any city employee. I will not make snarky remarks or sarcastic criticisms about our hard-working talented city employees.

I treat Jim differently, however. I hold him to a higher standard. Why?

Because Jim Bennett sits at the top of the proverbial food chain. Because he wants to wear the big-boy pants. Because he has more than 40 years of experience in city government.

But mostly because he often acts like an egotistical, condescending and arrogant son-of-a-bitch. What a pair we make.

A few months ago, former Mayor Alan Casavant, a friend of mine, called me and said that Jim Bennett thinks I treat him unfairly (I hear that from lots of people). I like Alan. I was his campaign manager when he first ran for the mayor’s seat in 2011 (I was not working as a journalist then). So, as a favor to the former mayor, I offered to sit down with Jim and a tape recorder and conduct a one-on-one interview on any topic of his choosing.

Reportedly, Jim did not like that idea. I’m guessing he was more worried about my tape recorder than he was about me.

Councilor Marc Lessard has often found himself on the wrong side of my pen. He and I have sparred publicly for more than three decades. But you know what? Marc always returns my calls promptly.

It’s not personal, it’s business.

Few people have suffered more because of my writing than Councilor Bobby Mills. Just ask him. But you know what? Bobby Mills always returns my calls.

Why? Because Lessard and Mills have thick skin and realize that I am a direct conduit to their constituents. To them, the people’s business is more important than petty, vindicative personality battles.

In all fairness, Jim Bennett can be a nice guy when he wants to be.

Jim is intelligent, and he does have a lot of municipal experience. He is also very involved in charitable work with the non-profit Kora Shrine Temple and commits hundreds of hours annually to the Shriners and their mission to provide free medical treatment for children.

All Jim needs is a thicker skin and a better attitude. But I don’t think he needs more highly paid assistants working in the city manager’s office.

I think Larry Vaughan, the mayor of Amity Island, said it best in the movie Jaws:

“Look, Martin, if you yell barracuda, people will say “Huh? What? But if you yell FOIA, we’ll have a panic on our hands on the Fourth of July.”

As always, thank you for reading, and I welcome your thoughts, especially if you disagree with me.

________

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Turn You Inside Out

~ Randy Seaver ~ 1 Comment

When Biddeford City Manager James Bennett first unveiled his proposed FY 2025 municipal budget last week, he made a point of reminding the city council and the public that the city is not operated like a business.

Bennett’s remarks were likely intended to get ahead of a frequent refrain often heard from beleaguered and stressed taxpayers. Almost like clockwork, municipal officials hear the same mantra: that the city should be run like a business.

Bennett says comparing the city to a privately operated business is not comparing apples to apples.

Biddeford City Manager James Bennett; photo from the city’s website.

For the most part, I agree with him.

A business is incorporated to make profit and provide a steady revenue stream to its shareholders.

In the private sector, businesses do not face several restrictions and other obligations that must be endured by public sector operations such as local and state governments.

For example, if an annoying reporter like me wants a printed copy of some internal inter-office memo within city government, then the government must accommodate my request for that information. I do not, however, have the same access to inter-office memos generated by companies such as Boeing, General Dynamics or even Pizza by Alex.

Those businesses are allowed to keep and defend trade secrets, whether it’s the design of a new landing gear or a new recipe for making calzones. They are not accountable to the media.

If the city chooses to build a new piece of infrastructure, such as a new road, bridge or sewer connection, it must jump through several hoops in order to ensure transparency and strict adherence to state and local laws. Every member of the public (property taxpayers and non-property taxpayers) gets to have a say in the plan. There must be ample public input and advertised public hearings.

Although the private sector cannot simply do whatever it wants, they can make things happen more efficiently because they are not hamstrung by all sorts of obligations in the public sector.

During his presentation, Bennett also pointed out that city is facing the very same inflationary pressures that are being faced by you, me and every other consumer.

I am paying more for heating oil. I am paying more for water, electricity and even internet service. My grocery bills have exploded even though our household consumption remains somewhat flat (unlike my stomach)

I understand that we are in an election year, but the economy is still a concern for many people, especially when it comes to soaring housing costs and people on fixed incomes, lying awake at night, wondering if they are going to lose their homes.

Well guess what? If you’re paying more to fill your gas tank, the city is paying more to fill its tank. If you’re paying more for electricity, the city is paying more for its electricity. If you’re paying more for toilet paper, ink cartridges or lightbulbs, the city is also paying more for those things.

Now I know some of you are saying the economy is not that bad. In fact, unemployment numbers are near record lows. While that’s mostly a good economic sign, it’s not very good news for the city.

Private employers throughout southern Maine are scrambling for workers. Help wanted signs are all over the place, forcing employers to add more incentives and higher pay scales for their employees.

The city is not immune from this problem. We have to be creative in figuring out strategies to attract and retain qualified employees.

Lack of affordable housing also presents a challenge for the city. If a young teacher right out of college is looking for a new job – or a new police officer right out of the academy is looking for a job, they have to consider how much it’s going to cost to either live in or commute to the city.

The city cannot magically drop housing costs. The same problem is affecting communities throughout the southern Maine area. It’s not just a Biddeford problem.

Running to Stand Still

So how do we get a handle on ever increasing property taxes?

In the private sector, we can reduce services. For example, Laura and I had a wonderful lunch at the Muddy Rudder Restaurant in Yarmouth on Monday. That restaurant is now closed on Tuesdays and Wednesdays.

Many other businesses are following suit. The private sector is also looking to technology to reduce overhead. Self-checkout cashier options, automated payment services and much longer wait times for customer service are becoming the norm.

Taxpayers want and demand municipal services. You want a qualified team of EMTs or paramedics to be available 24/7. You want your road plowed. You want that pothole to be fixed. You want police and a fire department that can respond within just a few minutes.

There’s nothing wrong with taxpayers demanding services to be provided by the city they support.

So where does that leave us?

Frankly, between a rock and a hard place.

But there is a flipside to this coin. If the Seaver Family Pizzeria decides to raise its prices by 20 percent, you can choose to either go someplace else or make your own pizza for a fraction of the cost.

In the private sector, you – – as a consumer – – have a choice. In the private sector, Seaver’s Pizzeria must be competitive with other businesses, such as Pizza By Alex. We can’t just arbitrarily jack our prices without probably losing customers (revenue).

Now where does the city get its revenue? Every dollar the city uses comes from your back pocket. The city does not produce a product. The city relies solely on taxpayer revenues, whether it’s state funding or revenue sharing, a federal grant, excise taxes, permit fees, etc., etc.

All the money comes from you and me. Period.

And guess what? We really can’t take our business anywhere else. I can refuse to shop at Walmart if I don’t like how they operate their store.

But when it comes to the city, you either pay your taxes or the city takes your home. Sure, there are a lot of legal steps that the city must follow in taking your property, but they will do it.

If you don’t believe me, just ask Dorothy LaFortune. (Read This).

As Jon Hamm’s character, Special Agent Frawley, said in the movie The Town, “this is the not the fucking around crew.”

Sure, you can fight City Hall, but ultimately, it’s quite likely that you will lose everything you own.

Bennett is pretty much right. The city is not a business.

The city does not have to be competitive for its consumers, like a private business. The city does not have to worry about losing its customers like a private business. The city, unlike a business, has a guaranteed revenue stream regardless of what happens with the economy.

So, is there any good news? Any shimmer of light on the horizon?

Yup. It’s you and your neighbors.

The city is ultimately controlled by its residents who choose to vote and participate in their government.

If you just sit back and bitch and whine on Facebook, don’t expect much of a change. It’s easy to find out who represents you on the council. Go to a council meeting or participate online.

Raise your voice. Do your part. Get involved. Reach out to your specific city councilor and the at-large representatives on the council. You can find their contact info here.

Don’t expect your neighbors to pick up your slack. Don’t expect me to keep you informed. You are a shareholder in this organization. It’s your responsibility to question how the city is operated.

The first public hearing on the city’s proposed FY 2025 budget takes place on March 26 at City Hall. If you can’t make it, reach out to your councilor in advance.

What Jim Bennett is recommending is another six percent budget increase, which includes a nine percent increase in municipal spending. If you’re good with that, just sit back, relax and enjoy a bowl of popcorn.

Otherwise, make your voice heard.

Note: If you’re having a hard time finding contact information or details about the city’s proposed budget, you can contact me for assistance.

_________

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Sixty Lessons Learned Over 60 Years

~ Randy Seaver ~ Leave a comment

Originally published (without pictures) in Saco Bay News

Since I am literally on the cusp of turning 60 this week, I thought for this installment of All Along The Watchtower, I would share 60 different things I have learned (sometimes the hard way) over the past 60 years. Here we go:

Alpacas are better than Llamas. Fact.

It’s okay for a grown man to cry during a movie, even if it’s Dumbo. Such behavior demonstrates empathy and significantly decreases your odds of becoming a serial killer.

Owning a dog is probably the closest you will ever come to meeting God before you die.

My sister, Kristeen, and I strike a pose on the stairs of our State Street apartment in Biddeford.

Cherish and nurture your friendships. Never take them for granted. Those relationships are more precious than gold.

Having and raising children is a sure-fire method of forgiving your parents for any transgressions.

Always go with the higher-quality toilet paper. Two-ply or better. It may cost more at the register but you will save money in how much you need.

Every single person has done silly and stupid things. Forgive yourself for the same behavior.

If you are going to drink Scotch, ALWAYS go with a single malt.

When eating out, be willing to try something new.

Lackland A,F.B, July 1982

Say “I love you” every single day to your spouse, your child or your dog. Then follow it up with an act of love.

If you travel to a foreign country, try to learn a few basic phrases of their national language, i.e. Please, Thank you, Hello, Goodbye, Good morning and good night.

Always tip your servers and bartenders at least 20 percent. If you can’t afford that, you can’t afford to eat out.

 Respect your elders. With any luck, you will be their age someday.

Never, ever, ever add a liquid accelerant (gasoline, kerosene, etc.) onto a camp fire in progress.

If you join the military, don’t pack a lot of stuff for your first day at boot camp. You won’t need it.

Everyone should have the experience of a night in jail. It really changes your perspective.

Moderation is nice, but a second piece of pie is better.

At least once in your life, jump into the north Atlantic Ocean in January. You will never feel more alive.

Try to do one random act of kindness each day, even something as simple as letting someone else cut in front of you in traffic.

Take good care of your teeth. Just trust me on this.

Live in different states across the country.

Teenagers should be required to read Kerouac and Hunter S. Thompson. Seniors should read those books again before judging young people.

Me and my mother, 1985

Remember: every person, including you, has an expiration date. Act accordingly.

Watch The Godfather for lessons in loyalty; watch Jaws to learn respect for nature; and watch The Blues Brothers to learn about having fun and paying your debts.

Get a library card and use it frequently.

Learn the value of being alone, sipping bourbon and listening to Miles Davis.

Pay attention to the world around you, be a voracious reader and a critical thinker.

Question authority, but don’t be a jerk about it.

Look up a former teacher and say “Thank you.”

It’s Daylight-Saving Time, not Daylight Savings Time.

When in Rome, do as the Romans do.

Steak should always be medium rare, and coffee is best served black.

Never miss an opportunity to vote.

Go to a local Little League game, especially if you don’t know any of the players. Cheer for all of them.

Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy are as real as you want them to be. Those are just different names for Kindness, Generosity and Love.

Use your headlights while driving in the rain, even during daylight hours.

Speaking of driving, ALWAYS wear a seatbelt.

It is always better to have too much than not enough.

If you’re not five minutes early, you are ten minutes late.

Learn to count to 10 in three different languages other than your native tongue. It’s a neat bar trick and makes the girls think you’re smart.

If you’re drinking really good, expensive bourbon, try to avoid pouring it over ice.

Guiness should always be served at room temperature.

With few exceptions, the book is always better than the movie.

Remember that white, Christian people were the very first immigrants to arrive in this part of the world.

Know the difference between faith and religion.

You never help a man see your point of view by giving him a black eye.

No matter how far down the scale you have fallen, it’s NEVER too late to do something nice.

Kindness is always a choice and an option. Always.

Sweating is good for you. It is a natural way for your body to rid itself of toxins.

Owning a cat teaches you humility.

Men: try shaving your legs and underarms every day for a week so that you can better appreciate what a pain in the ass it is to be a woman.

Men: Always give up your seat for a woman left standing. Always.

When shaking hands, do so firmly with direct eye contact.

Every person should own a roll of duct-tape, a can of WD-40 and a hammer. With these tools, you can fix almost everything.

Green plants will burn. In fact, anything will burn if it gets hot enough.

There is NEVER a reason or excuse to litter.

If you have not been, go to the Grand Canyon. It cannot be described with words.

To avoid shark attacks, stay away from the ocean.

Never underestimate the value of chocolate.

If you are afraid of rollercoasters, ride the Carousel. Never be afraid to have fun.

Talkin’ ’bout My Generation

~ Randy Seaver ~ 4 Comments

You see it from time to time, spread all over social media with reckless abandon.

Defying history, logic and reasoning, there is a growing chorus of complaints about “kids today,” and/or about how “life was better in the 1950s, the 1960s, the 1970s” and even the 1980s.

Social media platforms such as Facebook are plastered by memes that suggest the world is going to hell in a handbasket. These memes and the people who share them point to a simpler time; a better time for children and all of us.

Photo from Pinterest web site

Is it accurate? Are kids today so much worse than the kids of the past? Was life really better in the 1960s?

To borrow from Billy Joel: The good ol’ days weren’t always so good, and tomorrow ain’t as bad as it seems.

Nostalgia is nice, but it often distorts reality.

Complaints about “kids today” are usually generated by people over 50 years of age. The misgivings about today’s youth are often used as weapons in the war of generations, where there is a growing divide between aging “baby Boomers” and the nearly insufferable Millennials.

Baby Boomers were born between 1946 and 1964, so-named because of the population explosion that took place in the United States following the end of WW II.

Boomers today range in age from 60 to 78. This group was preceded by the so-called “Silent Generation,” people born between 1928 and 1945. It is commonly thought that this moniker derives from the notion that children “were to be seen and not heard.” This group represents folks between the ages of 79 to 96.

And yet the so-called “Greatest Generation,” is almost completely gone. The Greatest Generation moniker was created by NBC News journalist Tom Brokaw and his best-selling 1998 book of the same name.

These were the people who came of age during the Great Depression and the 1940s, Brokaw said, and many of them fought in World War II.” In his book, Brokaw described them as “a generation of towering achievement and modest demeanor, a legacy of their formative years when they were participants in and witness to sacrifices of the highest order.…This is the greatest generation any society has produced.”

On the other end of the scale, we have “Generation Z,” kids born after 1997.

Admittedly, I am biased but it’s probably because I – like so many others – tend to dismiss today’s youth and instead rely on my knee-jerk reaction to “kids today.”

I often want to drive my head into a brick wall, when I read or hear members of Gen Z or their predecessors, Millennials, complain about their elders and about what a horrible world they have inherited.

They (Gen Z and Millennials) actually believe that they are so much more enlightened, tolerant and compassionate than previous generations of Americans who allegedly left behind a world of racism, gender conformity, homophobia and a ruined environment.

They tend to place a greater value on safety versus freedom. They have only known a world that is instantly connected by technology, and they tend to bristle at the word: sacrifice.

Sweet Child of Mine

Are these kids today right or wrong? Are the complaints about them, their music and their culture accurate? Or are these kids today not much different than the kids of the 1970s, the 1950s or even the 1920s?

In the 1950s, many parents were worried about boys in leather jackets with grease in their hair. There was a radical new genre of music exploding on radios. Rock ‘n’ Roll, which was generated by Black musicians, took rhythm and blues to an entirely new level.

Artists such as Chuck Berry, Fats Domino, Billie Holiday and Ray Charles ignited the flames of rock music, inspiring so many others, from Elvis Presley to the Rolling Stones. On the Ed Sullivan show, Elvis Presley was shown only from the waist up while performing because his swinging hips were considered “too suggestive.”

But even before then, parents were worried about “lazy, insolent” children who were listening to the “devil’s music,” from artist such as Glenn Miller, Artie Shaw, Tommy Dorsey and Benny Goodman in the 1930s and ‘40s.

Swing music, the adults said, was encouraging sexual promiscuity as boys and girls danced suggestively and “Jitterbug” dancing reigned supreme.

In the 1960s, kids started growing their hair long; many became “anti-society” hippies and embraced a culture of “free love” and increased experimentation with illicit drugs. Today, those kids are getting ready to collect Social Security and buying time-shares in Boca Raton.

You get my point. There is one universal truth about children and their development: they absolutely love to piss-off their parents, crave attention and righteously believe that their generation is the “best.”

It is normal (and actually necessary) for kids to reject traditions; to protest and become aware of the world around them.

A simpler time?

Before you begin to wax nostalgic about how much better life was in the 1950s, the 1960s or the 1970s, consider this:

In the 1950s and 1960s, Black students couldn’t attend the same schools, colleges and universities as white kids. In the 1950s, kids were taught to hide under their desks as fears increased about a possible nuclear attack.

In the 1950s and 1960s, gay people were not allowed to be married or serve in the military. In the 1950s and 1960s, American kids were dying by the thousands in southeast Asia.

In the 1950s and 1960s, women generally earned much less than their male counterparts. When people proclaim that the ‘60s were a “more peaceful” time, I teeter on the edge of having a stroke.

In the 1960s, President Kennedy was assassinated; Dr. Martin Luther King was assassinated; Black activist Malcom X was assassinated; Bobby Kennedy was assassinated and the ongoing war in Vietnam escalated.

In the 1950s, we freely dumped toxic waste into rivers and streams. There was no Department of Environmental Protection.

But when – exactly – – did kids become so lazy and misguided?

Well, history is a brutal teacher.

Complaints about “kids today” can be traced to the Fourth Century, BC when Aristotle wrote: “[Children] are high-minded because they have not yet been humbled by life, nor have they experienced the force of circumstances. They think they know everything and are quite sure about it.”

Or how about this, first published in 1904 in the Psychology of Adolescence:

“Never has youth been exposed to such dangers of both perversion and arrest as in our own land and day. Increasing urban life with its temptations, pre-maturities, sedentary occupations, and passive stimuli just when an active life is most needed, early emancipation and a lessening sense for both duty and discipline…”

Or this from the Portsmouth Evening News in 1936:

“Probably there is no period in history in which young people have given such emphatic utterance to a tendency to reject that which is old and to wish for that which is new.”

In 1938, Leeds Mercury published this excerpt:

“Parents themselves were often the cause of many difficulties. They frequently failed in their obvious duty to teach self-control and discipline to their own children.”

There are many, many more historical examples of complaints regarding today’s young people from every generation since . . . well basically, forever.

In 1858, editors at the New York Times expressed concern about the invention of the telegraph.

“Superficial, sudden, un-sifted, too fast for the truth, must be all telegraphic intelligence. Does it not render the popular mind too fast for the truth? Ten days bring us the mails from Europe. What need is there for the scraps of news in ten minutes? How trivial and paltry is the telegraphic column?”

What would those guys have thought about the internet, Facebook or Tik-Tok?

Damn kids today. Technology is ruining everything!

Johnny, We Hardly Knew Ye

~ Randy Seaver ~ Leave a comment

Jon Stewart – a comedian and talk show host who was once a darling of the far left and progressive Democrats – found himself in some hot water this week when he made his triumphant return to the Daily Show on the Comedy Central network.

Jon Stewart/Photo: Scott Kowalchy, CBS

Stewart previously hosted the late-night “Daily Show” from 1999 to 2015. The show is generally considered satire, but Stewart was well-known for leaning hard left when it came to discussing politics.

Beyond being a comedian, actor, director and producer, Stewart is also a very decent human being who has consistently used his celebrity status to advocate for veterans in need of health care; and for first-responders who are still suffering from the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks in 2001.

Reportedly, viewership of the Daily Show has been somewhat sluggish since Stewart left the network nearly 10 years ago to pursue other projects, namely a streaming show on Apple + TV, The Problem with Jon Stewart.

So how did this funny, sharp-witted philanthropist — who never hesitates to rail against Donald Trump and the Republican Party — piss off almost every member of the Democratic Party on his first night back on the Daily Show stage?

Well, basically, someone didn’t give him the memo before the cameras began rolling on Monday. Stewart, a predictable defender of Democrats, failed to toe the party line.

Stewart (gasp) had the temerity to publicly criticize President Joe Biden, the presumptive Democratic Party nominee for the 2024 presidential election.

Wait! What?

Here, hold my beer, and I’ll explain.

Stewart decided to not use his very big stage to blindly support the man who he likely will be voting for in November. Instead, Stewart’s monologue focused on what a crappy choice we all have to make in November, Republicans and Democrats.

According to Newsweek, thousands of progressive Democrats spilled their iced-mocha cappuccinos on their laps when Stewart “equally” mocked Biden and Trump for issues related to their age, questioning whether either one of them was fit to serve as our commander-in-chief.

Progressives generally preach all day long about tolerance and diversity, right up until the point when the don’t like the subject matter. Then?

Well then, they are not so tolerant or diverse.

Reportedly, reaction to Stewart’s monologue raised a chorus of voices all over social media. Thousands of viewers pledged to never watch the Daily Show again. Social media platforms, including Facebook, X, Instagram and Tik-Tok, reveal that viewers went ballistic with their comments about Stewart and their disdain for so-called balanced commentary.

Here’s one of the thousands of comments that can be found on social media, according to Newsweek:

“FASCIST!! We’re seriously going to 2016 both sides this s*** again?! WTF is wrong with you?! JFC!! #TheDailyShow is a fascist-enabling s*** show!!”

Fascist? Seriously? Where did this person go to school? Today, apparently, the only thing you need to do in order to be labeled as a “Fascist” is to tell jokes about presidential candidates.

Are history books not available online?

I guess now Stewart can join with Bill Maher – another successful white comedian in his 60s who relishes poking fun at people on both sides of our nation’s political divide.

Maher – who hosts his own show on HBO – is another card-carrying Democrat who drew the ire of his political friends by refusing to be politically correct on his television show, Real Time with Bill Maher.

Maher is hilarious when he goes after politicians, policy makers and pundits of all stripes on his show.

Apparently, it will still be safe for progressive Democrats to watch the Comedy Channel, Tuesday through Friday.

Stewart will be working just part-time, only hosting the Daily Show on Monday nights. Talk about ‘Must-See-TV”  I’ll be watching.

Does that make me a fascist?

[Thanks to loyal reader Jeffrey Tippett for pointing out that there is no such thing as the “Democrat” Party. Such references should properly be listed as the “Democratic” Party . . . you know, the party of Democrats. The error has been corrected, We, here at Lessons In Mediocrity, rely on our readers to keep us on our toes.]

A Hard Day’s Night

~ Randy Seaver ~ Leave a comment

No one can deny that the city of Biddeford – once derided as “Trash-town U.S.A.”  — has today become an unlikely hip destination for young adults and others who enjoy an eclectic array of craft breweries, a diverse culinary scene and dozens of boutique shops and businesses that offer everything from gourmet cheeses to hand-crafted outdoor gear.

In fact, several national publications that cater to the promotion of unique culinary delights and a creative economy all point to the city of Biddeford as a place to be for young, urban professionals.

A photo from the Heart of Biddeford website

Not surprisingly, the city of Biddeford is today Maine’s youngest city, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.

What a change 23 years make, but that change wasn’t easy — and it does come with some equally undeniable consequences.

More about that in a moment. First, a bit of disclosure.

Over the past few weeks, I have been sorting through hundreds of stories I have written about Biddeford since the mid-1990s as part of the redesign and launch of this website, Lessons in Mediocrity.

From 1998 until 2002, before I met my wife, I lived in downtown Biddeford; on the third-floor above the Happy Dragon Restaurant on Main Street.

I also grew up in the Biddeford-Saco area. My family goes back four generations in this community. My wife, a former Biddeford city councilor, and I have been living at our home on Lamothe Avenue for just over 20 years.

After my time at the Courier, I continued to write/blog about the city, its politics and people. As a policy consultant, I worked on several local campaigns and issues. My kids went to Biddeford schools.

I also served on the Biddeford Airport Commission, the Downtown Development Commission and the Biddeford Zoning Board of Appeals.

Today, I keep my toes in the water by working as a free-lance writer, still writing about Biddeford for Saco Bay News.

You get the point. I have a close connection to Biddeford, a community I love and care about deeply.

Why am I sharing this now?

When we look at the city of Biddeford today, I think many of us tend to forget the challenges the city was facing then, when we literally burned our trash in the middle of downtown.

When I joined the Courier in 1998, my boss and publisher David Flood was already an ardent and outspoken booster for downtown Biddeford.

David – unlike me and several other people – saw big potential in Biddeford’s downtown, despite some overwhelming challenges that included the presence of a downtown trash incinerator and significant socio-economic hurdles.

In fact, David  – who was recently inducted into the Biddeford Hall of Fame — was one of the original founders of the Heart of Biddeford, a non-profit organization established in 2004 with a mission to promote economic development and improve quality of life in the city’s downtown area.

While former mayor Alan Casavant receives a lot of credit for the revitalization and renaissance of downtown Biddeford. It was actually former mayor Wallace Nutting who got the ball rolling, some seven years before Casavant was elected as mayor.

Nutting a retired four-star general and native of Saco, also had a strong vision of what downtown Biddeford could become.

Although Nutting, a former Pentagon official who served as a senior advisor to President Ronald Reagan, was one of the smartest, most distinguished and accomplished people I ever met, I thought he was off his proverbial rocker when he started talking about the city’s beleaguered downtown as a “destination for arts, culture and local shopping.”

But Nutting and Flood were not alone. The former mayor also tapped several other like-minded citizens to join him on his newest crusade. Ed Caron, a Biddeford attorney; Renee (Potvin) O’Neil, the woman who basically spearheaded the renovation of City Theater, and Donna Tippett all volunteered to help.

Nutting, the man who previously led the U.S. effort to extricate Manuel Noreiga out of Panama, had a new mission.

Failure was not an option.

What this core group – and later several other volunteers, business owners and residents – accomplished was nothing short of amazing.

But hindsight is always 20/20. It took years, taxpayer funding and political willpower to transform downtown from a neglected hodgepodge of businesses to one of the most vibrant cities in Maine.

Now back to those unintended consequences.

Biddeford After Dark

In the autumn of 2001, while working for David and Carolyn Flood, I decided to write a five part-series about downtown Biddeford, but with a twist.

My Biddeford After Dark series would explore the city’s then gritty downtown area during the overnight hours.

I would write about the punks who congregated at the 7-11 store near the intersection of Jefferson and Alfred Streets; I would ride along with third-shift Biddeford police officers and I would interview the late-night workers, including the supervisors at the MERC incinerator.

I don’t think David was crazy about my idea. I think he was concerned that my series would only perpetuate negative stereotypes about the city of Biddeford.

But – as was so often the case – David game me a wide berth and lots of latitude in running the newsroom.

At that time, I was living and working in downtown Biddeford. I didn’t write the series for overtime pay or to avoid my daytime responsibilities as the Courier’s editor. I was single. I lived alone. I did it for fun.

An excerpt from that series: “As I walk along Lincoln Street — past a tired wrought-iron fence that is leaning and lurching in places — I can almost hear the ghosts of the past. They call to each other, unloading bales of cotton, smoking cigarettes and wiping the sweat from their brows.”

Back then, the former Lincoln Mill clocktower was perched and rotting on the ground in front of the vacant and deteriorating mill building that is today – 23 years later– a luxury hotel with a roof-top swimming pool, a craft distillery and an expansive lobby that has become a favorite gathering place for locals and visitors alike.

Who would have imagined?

But here’s the other thing, the downside of the good news.

A photo I took of the former Lincoln Mill clocktower nearly 25 years ago.

In 2001, it wasn’t hard to find a parking spot in downtown Biddeford. In 2001, you didn’t see any homeless folks sleeping in doorways on Main Street. In 2001, rents – both commercial and residential – were among the lowest in southern Maine.

Why? Well, it’s pretty simple: very few people really wanted to live or shop in downtown Biddeford back then. The stench of burning garbage; shuttered and vacant mill buildings and crumbling infrastructure hardly gave off a welcoming vibe.

Sure, there were some notable exceptions. Legacy businesses such as Reilly’s Bakery and Biddeford Savings Bank were able to weather the storm created by an economic recession and the terrible decision to burn garbage downtown.

But many people had given up on the downtown. Politicians set their sights on easy targets: the development of Wal-Mart and other big-box stores on the outer end of Alfred Road, a proposed racino and continued suburban sprawl on the western side of the city.

As I go through the stories and columns I wrote back then, I am reminded of the tremendous debt we all owe to David Flood, Wallace Nutting, Renee O’Neil and so many others.

We should also never forget the business leaders, civic activists and policy makers who formed Twin Cities Renaissance, the coalition of visionaries from both sides of the Saco River who committed themselves to seeing MERC finally closed.

Sure, Alan Casavant deserves lots of credit for helping us believe in our city again, but he got a lot of help from people who believed in Biddeford even when many of us had given up on the city.

Thank you for your blood, sweat and tears.

In the movie Jaws, Mayor Larry Vaughan says he was just “acting in the town’s best interests” by keeping the beaches open.

In Biddeford, Mayor Wallace Nutting was acting in the town’s best interest by believing in his city and its people.

Make no mistake. Our city still has challenges and hurdles to clear. But if you look at what has been accomplished over the last two decades, Biddeford’s future seems bright.

Originally published in Saco Bay News

A Hazy Shade of Winter

~ Randy Seaver ~ 1 Comment

Some people see racism around almost every corner.

I am not one of those people, but . . .

Two days ago, the city of Saco and its neighboring communities were shaken by a violent crime that resulted in four suspects shooting at each other from their cars while traveling on Elm Street.

At the first press conference, Saco Police Chief Jack Clements described the suspects as “four Hispanic males”

One of the suspects involved in Friday’s shooting. Photo: Saco Police Department

It didn’t take long for bigotry, half-assed assumptions and hatred to begin spreading all over social media.

While I can certainly understand why many people expressed fear and concern, I cannot believe how much hatred is brewing in my own community.

Several people used the incident to underscore their disdain for President Joe Biden and his immigration policies.

Within two hours of the incident, Facebook was being flooded with racist rhetoric, such as: “See? This what happens when you have open borders.”

Or this: “Saco used to be a nice, peaceful town until these people came here and ruined things.”

The woman (a self-described Saco native) who posted that last comment conveniently forgets that Friday also marked the 25-year anniversary of Ashley Ouellette’s murder. Ashley, a 15-year-old Thornton Academy student, was found in the middle of the road by a passing motorist.

I remember covering that story. I don’t recall anyone blaming President Clinton. Of course, that terrible crime took place long before Facebook was invented.

If a Hispanic male commits a crime in southern Maine, he must be an “illegal immigrant.” He must be “one of those people.” Really???

These suspects have yet to be identified. How do we know where they were born? Maybe they were born at Boston General hospital. Maybe they were born at Maine Medical Center. Who knows?

Many people just assume if a Hispanic person is involved in a crime, he or she must be an “illegal immigrant.”

I hate to break the news to you: It’s entirely possible that these four men are United States citizens just like you and me.

I can’t prove that, but you can’t prove they are “illegal immigrants,” either.

Maine is vastly a rural state, in fact the most forested state in the country. Our violent crime rates are much lower than many other places.

For those of us who grew up here, things like the murder of Ashley Ouellette or Friday’s shooting incident are jarring – not at all common.

Imagine how people in Lewiston, Maine felt a few months ago when a mass shooting took the lives of 18 innocent victims.

The city of Lewiston is also home to a growing population of Somalian refugees who came to America seeking a better life. They are people “from away.”

The funny thing? The Lewiston shooter was a white guy. A United States citizen. A military veteran.

In fact, the overwhelming majority of mass shootings (7 or more random victims) are committed by young white men.

See? Members of the Abenaki tribe nailed it 300 years ago, when they said this place has gone to hell since these people from away came here.

The vast and overwhelming majority of Saco residents are some of the most decent, kind, generous and intelligent people you could ever hope to meet.

But sadly, the idyllic community of Saco is just like every other place: home to a few ignorant and insecure souls.